i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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