What a fucking waste of an outfit
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
