Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(207): View more from Maine

Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.

(1-207): View more from Maine

I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...

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(415): View more from California

its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead

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(954): View more from Florida

everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone

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(716): View more from New York

He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.

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(303): View more from Colorado

It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.

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(970): View more from Colorado

they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.

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(720): View more from Colorado

Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.

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