just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
