dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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