My brain says no but my pants say off.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
