No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
