At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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