do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
She told me I should be a condom model.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
