i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
