Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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