i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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