ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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