So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
