Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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