I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
