Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Randomize