To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
i've created a new STD.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
