margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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