sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
