It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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