is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
