I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
