OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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