The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Randomize
