So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
