"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
