ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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