i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
