Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
