Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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