do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
