I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
You can't just leave with hair like that
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
