i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
