I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
