I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
