Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize