I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
