hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
