Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
If that was your dad, he is hot
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
