Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Come share oat with me in your robe
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
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