Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
