Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Dicks are not precious.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
