No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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