My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
