You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
