if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
