Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize