i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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