I need help removing her.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
